To his credit, Carl the dense one ventured to clarify what exactly it is, that our sex bunny friend meant -- because with Stanley, really, you never know.
"What type of ring?"
"The type that is rock hard, perfectly shaped and fits just nicely," Stanley replied, refusing to let the bait go to waste.
To all of our relief, Stanley had indeed described an actual ring -- for the finger -- though why he wanted one was beyond us.
Then again, with Stanley, you never know.
And whatever -- and whomever -- Stanley wants, Stanley gets.
And so for the next few days, our group chat was filled with pictures of rings provided by Stanley for our approval and opinion -- which is a refreshing change for once.
After 15 minutes of replying with thumbs-up icons for every picture, Carl the dense one's attention span fizzled off like a can of Coke that's left in the open for too long and soon, the group chat became a monologue.
"The reason I want a ring is sort of like a birthday gift to myself," Stanley wrote without anyone asking.
"And I'm drawn to my birthstone -- Peridot -- in case you ask (which we weren't)".
"Also, as Adam would know, I love green (yes, I do know and Carl the dense one doesn't)".
"But a peridot ring is not exactly glam so I'm also looking at embellishing it with diamonds."
By then, Stanley was on his own because I didn't have his enthusiasm in exploring family jewels, and Carl the dense one couldn't catch up anymore.
Finally, last Friday afternoon, Stanley decided to make a bold move.
He has concluded that there are not enough men's rings that feature peridot and diamonds and most of them are very ugly.
And so, he will have a custom-made ring for himself.
It was something that calls for a gathering of sorts so we found ourselves at a shop in Tiong Bahru that specialises in creating jewellery for people with too much money to spare.
Two slim and pretty-looking girls attended to us in the spacious showroom, one of them focusing solely on Stanley's needs.
And to our surprise, the girl could satisfy our sex bunny's needs there and then.
"You know, I usually like it big, but for rings, I don't want them to be too bulky," Stanley was telling Jewel Girl.
"And I've seen a lot of peridot rings online -- they all look like one solid rock, which in another context, is a good thing for me," Stanley carried on loading too much info on Jewel Girl.
"Some of those rings look like they're worn by holy men -- the type which if you rub, a genie might come out," Stanley continued.
Knowing Stanley, I was very afraid for the girl for what might follow.
"For me, if I rub it, it shouldn't be a genie that comes out if you know what I mean," Stanley said as expected.
Jewel Girl broke into a hearty giggle, her white mask vibrating with her chortle.
I sighed with relief, happy that Stanley hadn't rubbed Jewel Girl the wrong way.
"I'll make you something that you'll like -- don't you worry," Jewel Girl said and with that, she brought out her shop's peridots for Stanley to see.
"I suggest using these smaller peridots -- along with diamonds of the same size," she said and began to arrange the gemstones with a tweezer.
To my left, I saw Carl yawning behind his mask, fighting the urge to doze off.
Jewel Girl then did a rough sketch for Stanley, explaining how she would place the gemstones that would both meet Stanley's brief and expectations.
"You have nice slender fingers, so a large stone won't work well. Instead, I'm using these smaller gems to shape the centre piece. These diamonds will go here to compliment the peridots."
Stanley's eyes lit up on seeing the sketch and the stones that were placed on a transparent sheet for his visualisation.
"I LOVE IT," Stanley said.
"It'll be set on white gold and what I'll do is, I'll combine two small rings to support the centre piece so that it looks classy and exquisite -- which is my impression of you," Jewel Girl said, her eyes squinting with delight.
Next, Jewel Girl held up a calculator and punched in many digits before showing the final figure to Stanley.
Carl's eyes lit up on seeing the amount.
"It's a good price that I'm willing to pay," Stanley said.
It would take two months for Jewel Girl to make the ring but Stanley left the shop that afternoon a happy man.
Carl was still dazed by how fast Stanley went from talking about getting a ring to actually deciding on a customised ring in a matter of days, though mainly, I suspect Carl couldn't t get over the amount.
"$3,200 is just a fraction of our salary," said Stanley, Crazy Rich Asian.
"Besides, I would love to have my family jewels to be as personal as possible," said Stanley, Crazy Asian.
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Adam's stories are based on real life events and inspired by real people
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