"Guys, are we in a throuple?"
Stanley was the first to respond -- via a voice recording.
"Who taught you that dirty word, ah boy?" he said, sounding like an uptight middle-class mother who needs her son to always score 10 upon 10 for Chinese Ting Xie.
"Who? Tell me! I need to grab a piece of soap and wash that mouth of yours!"
It is one of the rare times when Stanley the sex bunny grabs soap and actually wants to use it the way soap is meant to be used.
But I digress.
Carl, who recently discovered Netflix, felt obliged to answer Stanley via a voice recording.
"I learnt it on a show called The Politician," he said, sounding like a timid son about to get smacked by his mum who discovered him wearing girl panties and dancing in his bedroom.
"Oh, that's one show I will need to watch soon," Stanley replied, now sounding a little too sultry. "I hear there are gay characters in the series."
Nature of the show aside, Carl is bewildered by the concept of a throuple: A three-way relationship.
Carl the dense one, who still cannot grasp the concept of an open relationship, is understandably perturbed.
Leave it to Stanley the sex bunny, who can grasp all tangible and intangible sex elements to do the educating.
It's 2021, my dear, Stanley started.
And throuples are trendy.
Carl refused to believe Stanley, refused to believe how fast this world has evolved.
"It's cruel," Carl said. "Gay love has to be between man and man."
"Amen, sister," Stanley said. "Amen, men, men men..."
But to honest, the concept of throuples is indeed hard to swallow.
Even for Stanley, who never has trouble swallowing.
But right now, Stanley is busy spiting -- the brutal truth.
He posted a series of photos of three hot boys.
"These boys are in a throuple," Stanley explains. "And I know because I am Singapore's finest stalker and all cute guys cannot go under my radar. They can go under my table, but not under my radar."
Indeed, the three boys in the photos are cute and hot in their own way.
Stanley says these boys are not only openly gay, but also only proud to be in a throuple.
"That's an open relationship right?" Carl asked.
"No. An open relationship means, for example, Adam and I are long-time lovers and we have you over for sex once in a while," Stanley said.
Carl posted a gif of a muscular Latina woman vomiting.
"The concept of the throuple is that the three parties are in a committed and loving relationship with one another."
"It can be either combination: Man-man-man; woman-man,man; woman-woman-man; woman-woman-woman... you the idea. The basic principle is, it's an equal three-way love. You do the math," Stanley said.
Carl the studious student took it literally and posted a photo of an equilateral triangle.
"Well done," Stanley said, impressed by Carl's progress.
"But this still doesn't make sense to me," Carl said.
"How can one person love two other people equally, and have the two other people love the other two equally and so on?"
"Let's take this analogy out of maths, and put it in the category of liberal arts," Stanley said.
"It's a free society. It's liberal. Because should be allowed to do what they want if they believe in it -- plus, it's not illegal."
"Well, Section 377A would beg to differ," I pointed out.
"This concept doesn't belong to maths or liberal arts. It belongs to the rubbish bin," Carl said sulkily.
Actually, Carl isn't the only one who's still struggling with this concept.
I later thought about it and while I understand the concept of a throuple, I cannot appreciate the meaning of it.
There's no way one person can love two others equally.
A mother can love two kids equally... but surely she has her secret favourite?
For the next few days, Carl kept thinking about the issue.
He brought up the topic again about a week after he first messaged us about it.
"I still don't understand this," Carl said.
"Darling, neither do we," Stanley said.
"I can't decide if I prefer my left or right testicle better. What more, if I were to be in a throuple relationship."
"But there are so many things that are unexplainable, like, you know, the mysterious Bermuda triangle," he said aptly.
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Adam's stories are based on real life events and inspired by real people
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